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Wakenight & Associates, P.C.

9405 Bormet Drive, Suite 7, Mokena, IL 60448

Mokena | 815-727-6144

DuPage County | 630-852-9700   Oak Park | 708-848-3159

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Frankfort divorce attorneyNobody gets married with the belief that their relationship will end in divorce. Even so, more than 20 percent of marriages end within the first five years of marriage, and nearly 48 percent of marriages end within 20 years. Any divorce is difficult, and the process of dissolving your marriage can be very emotionally taxing, especially if you have been married for a long time. It is not uncommon for couples to be at odds with each other when they divorce, but it does not have to be that way. Though it may seem unlikely, it is in fact possible to have a peaceful and stress-free divorce. Here are a few ways you can complete the divorce process in a healthy and positive manner:

Make an Effort to Cooperate and Communicate

One of the most important things to remember is that communication and cooperation are two of the most crucial components of a peaceful divorce. When you and your spouse are both willing to work together, the stress of the situation is lowered significantly. Even if you are more willing than your spouse to keep the peace and work to reach a positive resolution to your case, you will be in a much better place.

Do Not Obsess About the Effects on Your Children

When parents get a divorce, they often worry about how the divorce will affect their children. While it is true that a divorce will require your children to make changes to their lives, they will probably not be as affected as you might think, and they can even experience positive effects because they will no longer be exposed to arguments or conflicts between parents. Though it is natural for you to be concerned about your children, you should not fret too much. Studies have shown that children of divorce tend to fare better than children whose parents stayed together in a loveless marriage.

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Will County divorce lawyerOne of the hardest decisions you may have to make in your life is deciding whether or not you should stay in a married relationship that is no longer working for the sake of your children. This type of decision does not come easily and should not be taken lightly. It can take months or even years to finally feel comfortable enough to act on your decision once you have made it.

Many people believe that a divorce is the worst thing that could happen to a family that has children. While a divorce does indeed have negative effects on children, those effects are usually short-term and can be mitigated if a divorce is smooth and minimally stressful. Studies have shown that staying with your spouse when you do not love each other anymore can actually be more detrimental to children than divorce. Here are a few ways in which staying together for the kids can cause more harm than good:

1. An Unhappy Home Can Lead to Low Self-Esteem

Studies have shown that children living in an unhappy household tend to have lower levels of self-esteem. This is because children absorb everything that they experience and can feel the unhappiness between parents. Often, this manifests as feelings of rejection and unworthiness in children, which can follow them into their adult life.

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New Lenox divorce attorney for child issues

When you have children, it changes your entire life. You put their wants and needs before your own much of the time, and you always want what is best for them. This is why many couples try to “stay together for the kids” even if they are not happy in their relationship. While this may seem like a good idea, studies have shown that staying in an unhappy marriage for the sake of the children actually does more harm than good. Children who grow up in unhappy households tend to have more problems than children whose parents got divorced. While it is true that a divorce can affect the children, there are things you can do to help protect your kids as you and your spouse separate from each other.

Take Your Fighting Elsewhere

Most people do not plan to have an argument, and disagreements or fights often happen in the heat of the moment. With that being said, it is important to avoid fighting in front of your children if you can help it. Studies have shown that children who are exposed to their parents’ constant fighting tend to have more behavioral and/or emotional issues. If you and your spouse have an issue you need to resolve, make sure you do it out of earshot of the children.

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 Frankfort divorce lawyer for child issues

Divorce can be a very stressful and emotional time for everyone in the family, but it can be especially difficult for children. There is no way to predict exactly how your child will react to a divorce, but many children experience feelings of sadness, anger, shock, resentment, and even guilt when dealing with their parent’s divorce. Many of these feelings are normal emotions that the child will experience as they go through the grieving process. Though there is no way around these feelings, there are many things you can do to help your child learn how to adapt to their new circumstances. Here are a few ways you can help your child cope with your divorce:

  1. Be Prepared to Answer a Lot of Questions

Children are naturally curious, so it is only normal for them to have a lot of questions once you break the news of the divorce. Your child might ask you where they are going to live, if you or your spouse will be moving out, why you are getting a divorce, and if they will change schools, among other things. You should be prepared to answer these questions, and if you do not currently have an answer for these questions, be honest with your child and tell them you will let them know as soon as you can.

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